Why you’d probably never end up with your soul mate


Falling in love is one of the greatest human experiences. It makes everything worthwhile, and helps bring completeness to an otherwise colorless life. Being with that someone who will love you and promise to be with you for the rest of your life is all anyone could ask for. I’ve been in and out of love, and I can say that it is the best feeling in the world!

A lot of people believe in soul mates. Someone who is a perfect match to your qualities. Someone for whom you tend to develop a natural affinity, a sense of belonging for. I’ve been a long time believer in soul mates, and I’ve learnt a lot with every step of my journey so far. I’ve been battered and bruised, hurt badly, but I’m still looking. Still looking for Ms. Right!

If you are one of those looking to find your soul mate, and have been at it for a while, this is for you. Here are 5 reasons why you’d probably never end up with your soul mate.


#1 There’s more than a billion people to search from
Just a number I’m throwing out there, but you get the picture. There are a lot of people in the world, and finding your true soul mate seems like finding a needle in a haystack.

#2 The wrong choices are awfully tempting…
A lot of choices will come your way. And a lot of these would appear awful tempting, but won’t work out due to some reason or the other. You may end up getting hurt or frustrated that you’re back to square one.

#3 The right one won’t carry a sign that says, “Pick me!”
Identifying the right one isn’t a piece of cake either. Your soul mate won’t be carrying a sign saying, “Pick me! I’m it”.

#4 You’re running out of time…
You aren’t getting younger by the minute. A lot of pressure could come up from family, friends, well wishers to get settled. Or it could be one of your personal goals to get married by a certain age. Time is not a friend, it waits for no one.

#5 Your soul mate has to love you back
Well, you think you’ve found your soul mate. The perfect match, made in heaven you say. Everything looks good, but there’s a catch. Someone else got to them first. Or they don’t feel that way about you. Or they just don’t like you. Or worse, you’re related (yikes!)

Ugh, doesn’t sound too good, does it? So what do you do? I’d say, keep looking! But don’t look for a soul mate, rather look for someone you like spending time with. Or who understands how you feel without you actually saying the words. Or who would care for the small things that you do, however insignificant they are for you. You won’t be perfect, but close enough and willing to make the required adjustments along the way.

What do you do when you fall in love that doesn’t end too well? We’re humans, we all make mistakes. Sure, it will hurt. You might even say that it feels like a kick to the nuts. But don’t lose hope, give yourself time to heal. And then, try again later.

What do you do when you really find the one? Congratulations! You’re truly lucky; maybe even possess god-like powers. Hold on to them and never let go! Fight for them. Love them beyond normal.

For those who are still looking, happy searching!

© 2013 Mihir Kamat
Inspired by this week’s writing challenge.
All images used are either stock or courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.
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31 thoughts on “Why you’d probably never end up with your soul mate

  1. I believe in soul mates, I met mine 30th November 1981 and we were married 13th February 1982, we have now been married 31 years, ok there are been difficult periods there always is in any relation, personal, business or social. My recommendation to anyone looking for their soul mate is…….stop, your trying to hard, you have to relax, you have to stop hunting, stop dressing yourself as a peacock on heat.

    Sorry Mihir But………….It’s more to do with how you perceive yourself. Everyone will score themselves between 1 being ugly as the back end of a cow and 10 being the most beautiful thing that has walk on Gods green earth. Most of us will look at a suitor and score them either 1 point above or 1 point below then you score yourself. There are so many things that make you choose a partner, the score, a female will look for a triangle shaped torso, walking tall without any physical defects, you need them to be able to hunt and provide. Men will look for child bearing hips, small facial features especially the nose, a caring nature, someone to bear the children and care for the offspring. Of course all this all done subconsciously, a throw back to when men carried a club and dragged their knuckles. Having studied psychology, I loved studying the psychology of attraction, but of course there is more to it then just physical attraction, beauty is only skin deep, its what is inside, no one wants a grumpy human to wake up to every morning so if you are having trouble finding your soul mate.

    The first thing is to look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself,
    Age is not a factor love is a feeling, feelings do not change with age only people.
    Be honest with yourself and others, no one wishes to be lied to even little white lies.
    Smile, smiling makes your face glow, even if you have nasty teeth, you never know you may attract someone who also have nasty teeth, I am joking.
    Cleanliness is next to Godliness, smell good, don’t over power with perfume. The jury is still out over Pheromones, they may work on pigs, but your not a pig. Men, a very light aftershave, women a gently light perfume.
    Don’t try to hard, male and females can spot someone trying to hard, think about when someone you know who tries to hard
    Be positive, Be positive, Be positive.
    And lastly…..
    Confidence I have left this till last as its the most important. If you have no confidence in you and no way you project yourself, then print this out, screw it up and stick it in the bin then empty the bin into a bigger bin and set fire to it all.

    Everyone can see confidence, but don’t be over confidence as that will turn you desperate that will chase everyone away and make you look desperate and being desperate will only attract other desperate and you will have your own desperate group all sitting in a circle sipping weak tea and talking about the weather.

    So your Soul Mate is out their so go and get them and have a long and happy future together….. 🙂

    • Hi Mihir, you seem to have been through a lot with love. SoundEagle would like to commend Mihir on the thoughtful post and praise Mysoresoul for the extended, comprehensive reply.

      Please allow SoundEagle to add to the discussion here as follows:

      There are three phases in the adult life. The first is the “Experimental Phase”, valid for a person usually aged between 17 and 35+, where the person tends to travel and sample the world to see what’s out there and where/how they fit in.

      The second is the “Consolidation Phase”, valid for a person usually aged between 25+ and 60+, where the person tends to be career-minded and seeks a partner to consolidate their wealth and to raise a family.

      The third is the “Soulmate Phase”, valid for a person usually aged 55+ or 65+ (depending on the age of retirement), where the person tends to be well-off financially and no longer needs to be concerned with career and/or raising a family. Aided by accumulated wisdom and wealth, the person is free to stay with the existing partner/spouse, or to seek one or more soulmate(s) in environments or circumstances that are (far) less encumbered by peer pressure, social expectation, career and/or family duties.

      What do you think of SoundEagle’s explanation, Mihir and Mysoresoul?

  2. I have to disagree with you on this post, though it has inspired me to write a blog article about why you can and will find your soul mate.

    I have been through a lot as well, but when I truly began to listen to God I found him, or we found each other.

    We all possess “God-Like” powers! I can tell you how to find the one, but you’d have to believe that it is possible. And, no I’m not talking about some Match.com sort of thing.

    I’ll offer you two tips:

    1. Ask God and Permission yourself to request the experience that you want to have in life.

    http://ressurrection.wordpress.com/2011/01/03/how-to-ask-for-what-you-really-want/

    2. Prepare for finding the one. In order to do this you must have the right perspective and have an idea of the process for dating, courtship, engagement and marriage.

    http://ressurrection.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/what-does-the-bible-say-about-dating-courtship-engagement-betrothal-marriage-sex-before-marriage-and-living-together-before-marriage/

    Feel free to leave a comment there. I promise you it is possible to him who believe.

    Peace,

    Ressurrection
    @AJourneyToLove
    http://www.facebook.com/ressurrectiongraves
    http://www.ressurrection.wordpress.com

  3. I love how you went about for this challenge, even though I don’t agree with any of your arguments 🙂
    For instance, how’s it 1bn? You’re looking for a girl, so that makes it half a billion. Your soulmate will most probably be someone like you–so well educated, urban etc.– so that should mean probably a million or so. And they’re searching for you too, so twice the effort for the same end result–that’s pretty good odds to me! I agree with Mysoresoul, your first comment: Be positive! (It really works; I’ve tried it)

  4. Lovely post. I really enjoyed it. I am not saying whether I am agree or not its you perspective and somehow you are right. I am still in process of search but I believe in soul mate. A person who comes in your life has some connection with your soul & its depend on both of you how you take that connection & relationship far.

    Thanks once again for this lovely post.
    GOD BLESS YOU

    • Thank you. I wanted to put out a point of view based on my experiences over the past years. Your last line makes a lot of sense to me, it is exactly what I believed all these years.

  5. I’d say that the harder you look, the more elusive the soul mate becomes. The best way to find your soul mate is to lead your own life and be happy with it. That way if they show up, it’s a bonus rather than a solution to happiness. Finding the soul mate shouldn’t be the holy grail: it may sound corny, but many people want to be loved because they don’t know how to love themselves.

  6. So glad I found this blog post! whew… If I find yet another of these “soul mates” now I know just where to have him delivered

  7. Soul mates do exist. Finding your soul mate is as much about finding you as it is about finding your other half. It is not just destiny, it is a science, a spiritual science. I could go on and on…maybe i will write a post about it someday..:) You have a great blog and a lovely tagline…cure for the creative itch. Look forward to curing my creative itch by visiting your blog 🙂

  8. i know this sounds lame, but i think/feel that my soulmate is a guy who is a “soon to be priest”. I met him, no cut that, i did not actually meet him, but i saw him on tv and i felt a connection, i dont know, i really cant explain it. i saw him on tv and googled him and fortunately i found his facebook account. i discovered that his oridnation to priesthood is next week saturday and i seriously had the thought of stopping him lol am i crazy?

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