I do… or don’t!


Well here’s a debate that I’ve been trying to avoid for a while but it’s starting to raise it’s ugly head. A lots been happening lately that’s got my family (and thus, me) thinking about the “M” word. For starters, after the recent marriage of my cousin sister earlier this year, I’ve had all the aunties and uncles smiling and winking at me mischievously. They say I’m now the most eligible bachelor in the family! Guys, although I’m honored and touched by the sentiment, I’m honestly scared as hell! This isn’t something you think about growing up and I’m no exception to that.

I’ve always been the touchy pushy type and imagined marriage to be something beautiful, something magical. Imagined it to be like the movies, only I’d be the hero. And my bride, the heroine, being the most beautiful person present at the ceremony! I’d promise to have and hold her in sickness, health, happiness, misery, and the lot, and promise to love her more than I do myself – then we’d be together for as long as we shall live (lets ignore the “Saat Janam” or “for seven lives” concept of Indian marriages for now). And she’d be my better half, blah blah blah.

Someone asked me, “What type of girl would you like to marry?”. Now that is an unfair question. What do you mean by type? Is there even such a thing? How do you even decide this? Well, if you are asking me about qualities I can define some of the good ones, but it can turn into a really vague set of requirements. Now here’s the problem. Finding that “heroine” who is homely, moderately pretty and sufficiently intelligent. Someone my mom would approve of. Someone who doesn’t think I’m boring. Someone who can laugh at my good jokes and tell me when some of them are really bad. Someone who will comfort me and hold my hand when I’m stressed. Someone who will watch that movie one more time just because this time I’m there. Someone who can respect my opinions and trust my judgement. And finally someone I could think of spending a long long time with and wake up to everyday. This isn’t a laundry list!

I hope I’ll find my heroine somewhere, in time before I lose all my hair and probably some of my teeth! And we’ll be dancing around trees and bushes all Bollywoody style! My mind is saying, just wing it! There’s someone out there who will tolerate me for who I am, and I’ll know when I see her. Patience, dear boy, patience!

© 2012 Mihir Kamat

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